Government & House Purple
Who runs Dingle?
A President who guards the Constitution, a House Purple that makes the law, a Government that answers to it, and the Final Boss, the court with the last word on all of them.
The President
The President is Head of State and guarantor of the Constitution. In the words of Article 47: “The President doesn’t govern. The President guards.”
The President is elected by the whole country on the first Thursday in October, once every ten years, and nobody gets a second term. Candidates must be 35 or over, belong to no party and never have sat in the House Purple. That makes the President the only nationally elected figure who has never been an MHP.
The House Purple
Dingle’s parliament has one chamber and 175 Members, and everyone calls it the Purps. It sits on Scotty Road in New Childwall, Port Ringo, in a building made two-thirds from basalt, pumice, purple-dyed andesite and obsidian, and one-third from Canadian timber, under a great semi-circular glass dome.
- 100 constituency seats, won first past the post, and 75 list seats, shared out so the chamber matches the national vote.
- No threshold. Any party with enough votes for a seat gets one.
- Elections on the first Thursday in May, every four years. Nobody can call one early, not the President, not the Prime Minister and not the House itself.
- No by-elections. When a seat falls vacant, the next name on that party’s list takes it.
- Voting age: 16.
The House is chaired by the Speaker, Beatrice Pugh, a former list MHP who gave up her party on election, as Article 57 requires. The last general election was held on 3 May 2029.
| Party | Seats | Role |
|---|---|---|
| Social Dinglecratic Party (SDP) | 53 | Government |
| Liberal Dinglecrats | 38 | Official opposition |
| STUD (Socialists and Trade Unionists of Dingle) | 29 | Government |
| Dinglese Communist Party | 18 | Opposition |
| Blackbirds | 15 | Opposition |
| Dingle Greens | 14 | Government |
| Independents | 4 | Opposition |
| Militants | 2 | Opposition |
| Board of Dinglese Jews | 2 | Opposition |
| Total | 175 | Government majority: 96 to 79 |
How a Bill becomes law
- The Government or any Member brings a Bill to the House Purple.
- It goes through three readings and a committee stage. As Article 59 puts it, “Nothing goes through in a day,” unless the Government declares it emergency legislation under the Eleventh Amendment.
- Once the House has passed it, the President grants assent under Article 49: licking the Great Seal, affixing it to the Bill, signing it, banging the gavel and declaring, “These are the rules now.”
- It becomes law when it has been signed and published, and not before.
The Government
The Prime Minister is whoever holds the confidence of the House Purple. Dr Duncan Black (SDP, The Dodd Coast) has been Prime Minister since May 2025 and won a second term on 3 May 2029. He leads a coalition of the Social Dinglecratic Party, STUD and the Dingle Greens. Every Minister must be an MHP, and every ministerial meeting is published within fifteen days.
| Post | Holder | Party and seat |
|---|---|---|
| Prime Minister | Dr Duncan Black | SDP, The Dodd Coast |
| Secretary for Woolyback Affairs | Janice Warrington | SDP, New Swan |
| Secretary for the Island | Carlos Knight | STUD, Huyton de Ma: The Spanish Quarter |
| Bean Counter | Paula McQueen | STUD, Nightingale |
| Secretary for the Environment | David Ben Sagol | Dingle Greens (list), party leader |
| Attorney General | Lauren Whitchurch | SDP (list) |
| Secretary for Scouse | Andy Harvey (Queen Lad Dee Fah) | SDP (list) |
| Chief Swot for the Island | Simone Bilbao | SDP |
| Secretary for Capitalism | Neville O’Shaugnessy | SDP |
| Comptroller of Secrets | Furfendale Yakubu | SDP, Taribo East |
| Secretary for Socialism | Bernard Clawson | STUD, party leader |
| Secretary for Healthy Scousers | Diane Crowley | STUD |
Outside the Cabinet: David Reed, Minister for Woolygration, Victoria Woodland, Constitution Minister, and Nathaniel Sherman, Minister for Prisons. The Leader of the Opposition is Lenny Pengar (Liberal Dinglecrats, Egg Berth: Walrussia).
The Prime Minister lives and works at The Blind School in New Childwall, Port Ringo, the official residence and office of every Prime Minister since the founding. The Republic’s first Prime Minister was Tommy McAleese.
The Final Boss
The Final Boss is Dingle’s highest court, and it is spoken of as one however many judges sit. It can rule on whether anything done under the Constitution was lawful, including anything done by the President. Nobody has to bring a case, and it doesn’t go looking for one.
Judges are appointed by the President on the recommendation of the Judicial Council, which has a lay majority chosen by the House. No Minister is involved. Judges retire at seventy.