Public Services
Bizzies, Nee Nors, courts, councils, the Health Service and everything else the Republic runs for the people stood on it. Most of it is owned in common, all of it is answerable, and none of it is for sale.
In an emergency, call 151 for the bizzies, the Nee Nors, fire and rescue or the coastguard. Calls are free from any phone on the island.
Emergency services
The Bizzies
Policing by consent, from local units to the Firm, the Border Bizzies and the Diplomatic Protection Squad.
Policing →Nee Nors
The Dinglese Ambulance Service. Free, fast and named after the noise it makes.
Ambulance service →Fire and Rescue
Firefighters for an island with no trees, plenty of chip pans and a volcano underneath.
Fire and rescue →Coastguard and Lifeboats
Two hundred miles of Atlantic, the weather that comes with it and the crews who go out in it.
Coastguard →The state and its institutions
The Health Service
Whatever a clinician says you need, free, with no limit put on it by cost.
Health →Courts and Justice
The Final Boss, three-judge trials, no juries, no secret courts, and trial by combat for parking tickets.
Justice →GRASS
The General Responsible Authority for Scouse Security. Yes, we know.
Security →Money and Tax
The Quid, the Shrapnel, the Central Bank of Dingle and the Island Revenue.
Money →Heat, Power and Utilities
Geothermal heat at cost, water, broadband and buses, owned in common for good.
Utilities →Travel and Borders
Baker International Airport, the ports, visas and claiming your Is Right La.
Travel →Councils and Civil Service
Local offices of one national government, your identity card and yer NAN.
Councils →Schools and Universities
Free, secular and compulsory from four to eighteen, and free after that.
Education →Dingle Broadcasting Service
The state broadcaster, DTV News and Parliament TV, in a country with no press regulator.
Broadcasting →Culture and National Days
The Rigobert Song Contest, the National Collection and the days everybody gets off.
Culture →Page last reviewed: 29 October 2029
